Monday, April 18, 2011

Multitudes on Monday

As Easter and Resurrection is fast approaching, I find myself thinking often about that time in our history. My heart and mind fill with thoughts and feelings about that day of crucifixion. Because of my mommas heart, I can't help but think about Jesus' mom, Mary. I think about how she must have felt watching her son being treated the way He was, how her heart must have been breaking into millions of pieces. As a mother, she must have wanted to defend her son and take on all those people who were beating him and cursing him, and yet she could do nothing, knowing her son was doing the Lord's will, what he was born on this earth to do. When I think about her, my heart breaks for her. How she must have hurt so badly and how hopeless she must have felt! I think about what a wonderful woman of God she was. How her personality was created long before Jesus' birth, knitted her mother's womb, with the soul purpose of being able to hurt for her son but not actually be able to do anything about it other than to weep. She had a faith and was certain that while she didn't understand the why or the ration behind the act, that God was not allowing anything to happen to her that He hadn't equipped her to deal with. I am so in awe of this wonderfully equipped woman of God!

I am working on that myself.. getting up each morning and telling myself that God isn't going to allow anything to happen in my life that He hasn't equipped me to handle. Some days I do better than others. Other days, I question my strength and abilities to deal with the smallest of issues. I look at other people, women in particular, and am awed by how Godly and in control they seem to be and Satan loves to use that to second guess and feel awful about myself. Then I am reminded that I am "fearfully and wonderfully made". God made me with a purpose exactly as I am! So He also knows what I can handle and what I can accomplish, when I allow Him to do it and not rely on myself.

Thank you God for loving me enough to give up your Son for me and my wickedness. Your gift is beyond my ability to comprehend, but I am eternally grateful!


#66... Warm sunshine

#67... Time on my front porch enjoying the sun and the quiet first thing in the morning

#68... The smell of little boys hair when they have been outside playing in the sun

#69... Surprises from my boys

#70... a healthy marriage

#71... Conferences and new ideas

#72... Laughter and new adventures

#73... conversations with those who know me best without speaking a word